A Priceless Gift

I've been up since 4:30 a.m.  It's a product of my body conspiring against me.  Oh well.  I suppose it has it's perks since there's no one asking me to get them fruit snacks at this time of the day! Several moments of my time at church yesterday keep bumping into one another.  I thought I'd try to make sense of what my heart is telling me.

 One of the ladies in our neighborhood is very sick, and it doesn't look good right now for her.  My heart aches for her and her family.  Family is truly a priceless gift.  When I peel away all the distractions away from my life, family and the gospel is what's left.  Putting myself in her shoes for a second, I find it would be hardest to leave (even for a short time) my precious children and my dear husband.  Time with my family is precious.

Having a cast on my foot is a test in futility.  I managed to get my baby, her blanket, and my purse with me to Sunday School.  I got there a bit late, and found an open spot I could manage to hobble towards.  It was on the front row.  When Sunday School was over, I became a captive to my seat, and as such, enjoyed the conversations raging around me.  One sister had taken my baby for some of the time and as she passed by, I thanked her for her help.  She started talking to a brother in our ward whose son had spoken in Sacrament Meeting as the culminating event for serving his mission.  She conveyed the message that his son was a testimony to their success in raising him.  He noticed my baby girl, and mentioned how we both had cute girls in our families, and that we ought to have more.  He said it several times in a matter of a couple of minutes giving the reason as evening up all the boys that are out there.  Maybe this wasn't what he was trying to communicate, but I couldn't help take with me the thought that we need to have more girls that are strong in the gospel, and able to stand up to what this world can hand them. 

When I was pregnant with my second child, my husband and I ran into a mom of some of his acquaintances at a wedding reception.  She was kind and asked me about how many children we had.  Perhaps she could see my little boy was still a baby, and we were close to adding a new little one to our family.  Whatever her reason, she told me she'd had thirteen children (if my memory serves me correctly).  She told me children were wonderful, and the more the better.  Then, she promised me that if I could have more children than she had, she'd give me $100.  I chuckle about that memory now since I'd want more than a $100 for my efforts!  A couple of years later, we ran into that same lady at another event.  I can't remember what we talked about, but only a week or two later, she went to the effort of finding our home, and giving me a picture I loved.  It's a picture of a mom watching her son as he tries to match the same stride of the Savior in a painting on the wall.  I don't know why she did that, but I could tell of her dedication to family.  Maybe it was her way of sharing it with me.

A couple of years later, I was pregnant with perhaps my fifth or sixth child.  I was sitting in a recreation center, trying to rest while keeping track of my busy children.  I noticed another woman sitting across the way.  She was holding a brand new baby.  We got to talking, and I asked the obvious question:  "How many children do you have?"  She told me she had just had her thirteenth child.  I tried to wrap my mind around that number and stick it into what I knew then about mothering.  Then, she said, "It's so worth it!"  She went on to tell me how her older children were so sweet with her baby and how much they helped out.  She told me of the joy she had when they were all together.  Then, she ended by telling me that the more children she had, the more she realized how much more she treasures her new little ones.  I don't know what inspired her to share her thoughts on motherhood with me.  It certainly wasn't the best time or place.  But her words have stuck with me and shaped mine.

The world is changing.  Someone said yesterday in Sunday School that the world is expecting more from our children now.  The standards have been raised, and children need to be more accomplished.  I can see that myself.  As parents, we're expected to put our children in multiple extra-curricular activities and make sure they have straight A's plus making sure they're properly groomed, eating a well-rounded diet, and still take time to make sure our family has quality time together and that the children have time to be children.  It's no wonder families have fewer children (four is evidently the new six).   A couple of years ago, I was at the doctor's office, trying to schedule an appointment.  A nurse was passing the desk and gasped at the sight of my calendar.  She said she was grateful she didn't have my schedule.  I wasn't even turned to the current month!  With the addition of each child, I test the limits of what I'm capable of orchestrating in my home.

Despite the fact my husband and I can kill a conversation with the sentence, "We have 10 children," I have no regrets.  I sat on a church bench yesterday and watched my older children holding my little children.  Cecilia played with Shalyn and then handed her off to Cali trading her for Alyssa.  Garrett was holding Ruby, and leaned over to kiss Shalyn on the top of her head.  What a priceless gift!  I thought I truly loved my older children when they were younger, but with each new child, I learn just how much more love it's possible to hold and to give.  My love for each one grows every day, and the wonder I feel at them being who they are keeps hitting new highs.  I feel incredibly blessed!  Each of my children are precious gifts, and each day, I discover that all over again!